Do you dress your age?
What is your fashion age?
This is not a judgement about how you dress, just a myth-busting blog here. The idea of dressing your age is asinine. Magazines have shown us for years what to wear in your 20’s, 30’s, 40’s and beyond. I don’t dress my age because I don’t believe in that. An age does not come with a package of clothing appropriate for that decade or number. Yes, babies should not wear high heels, but children are not part of the point here.
How old are you in fashion years? Where do you shop? Where do you want to shop? What do you want to get away with, but feel like you can’t pull it off? Answer: Just decide it. Love yourself. And own it, work it, live it. You can change your style whenever you want…and your life to. Let’s first start with the clothes though.
I love Forever 21. I’m almost 38. I would never want to be 21 again. I don’t pretend I’m in my 20’s. What would that even mean? I know some people judge women when they dress sexy or too “young” as wrong or trying too hard. What if they are just trying to be themselves. I dress for me. It’s fun. I’ve been experimenting with style since I was a kid, minus a few years in my early twenties where I was pretending to look the part of a mom.
I lost myself in the idea of what a mom “should” look, do, and act like. That repressed life force, that hiding of my wildness and untapped creativity made me angry. Rage is something I know well and I’ve embraced my own shadow side which has been angry and acted a fool in many ways. I still love her…as in the dark side of me. I am more Light, of course, but I own my shadow as well. Maybe there are some people just full of Light, that lack the depths I’ve explored in the human experience. I’ve been clinically depressed, suffered terrible anxiety, and felt lonely in a crowd, wearing it like an old coat. I taught myself how to love myself enough to become me…and wear fishnets, short jean skirt, and gold high heels on a Wednesday in New Jersey, ownin’ it like I’m a hipster 25 year old in NYC. Fashion is one of my vibe raisers. It makes me who I am. But I don’t base my opinion of others on what they wear. I realize there are clothes people and car people and cat people…and people that prioritize things different than me. I’m hot for fashion. I’m thinking my fashion age is 25. What’s yours? Have you figured it out yet? If you don’t like fashion, don’t sweat it. Just be you and live for yourself first, sweet peach.
What a difference a decade and self-love make?
The 30’s me embraced my writing, found myself, and created my reinvention.
As I was driving home from getting my hair done, all lookin’ cute and fierce, Prince was playing on the radio, taking me back to my 80’s childhood. Then what came on next was Alanis Morrisette. I thought about driving around playing that tape after I graduated high school and had no idea what I wanted to do in life. I thought of how I love life so much more than my 18 year old self could imagine. 18 year old me would never have believed we would be pregnant and married the next year. Best things to ever happen to me though. My hubby and oldest daughter have taught me so much. The rainbow after the storm of my teens. I should have saved the clothes though. They’re all coming back now. 90’s clothes and 70’s clothes, which is funny because 70’s clothes were cool in the 90’s too as I rocked some bell bottoms and tye-dyes. I see my life through pictures and what I was wearing at what age. I love being trendy, but also, just deciding on a look and going for it. Stay tuned to all the florals I have coming up in my vacation fashion next month. And sunglasses. I’m obsessed with them. I did get some clothes my oldest daughter deemed “my age.” I laughed. Of course, I’ll trend them up with some sunnies and headbands. Growing out the bangs is a pain. Headbands help. I got a silver one that reminds me of Alexis from Dynasty. I still love the clothes and glam from that era.
So back to my outfit from today and my fashion age. I realized I had to go to one of my kids’ schools and looked at my outfit. My 25 year old outfit on a 37 year old.
“What is she wearing?”
“Did you see what she’s wearing?”
“A mother shouldn’t dress like that?”
“Where does she think we live?”
The old me, which ruled the roost until age 33, would have thought that people were thinking and saying these things and go into shame for wearing what I wanted. I know people could still do that, but what my inner voice I said when I looked at my fishnets…”Oh well.” I don’t care if people like how I dress. If they judge me, that’s their judgement. I played small for many years, afraid to be this chick I am now…loud and proud…wild and free…and owning it. I love to help empower, inspire, and uplift others, even if only through what I post online. There is lots of good stuff in my book, “Sexpot With Stretch Marks” if you want to read more from me. If you want to find, discover, or reclaim your mojo like I did, contact me. I work on lots of stuff with people, all of which go through a mind-body-spirit change. I transform lives through my coaching. It’s beautiful to be a part of.
In your 20’s: Wear what you want, have fun, and love yourself.
In your 30’s: Wear what you want, have fun, love yourself fully…forgive the 20’s you.
In your 40’s: Wear what you want, have fun, love yourself completely…no for real this time.
In your 50’s: Wear what you want, have fun, love yourself unabashedly and live like it’s no longer dress rehearsal.
In your 60’s: Wear what you want, have fun, love yourself to the depth of core and do whatever the hell you want.
In your 70’s: Wear what you want, have fun, and love yourself…you don’t need anyone else’s advice. You got this.
Instead of dressing your age, dress for your vibe. It’s so freeing. If you only live in sweatpants because you love comfort, rock those sweats with pride. They do sell them with sequins on. Just sayin’. I own them. Smooches!