Why I’m a phony?

And you are too.
What?
Blasphemy for a life coach!

Do I really believe this?

No.  I think we are all human.  I think some of us try to focus on the positive.  And if you are promoting your business, lifestyle, coaching or positioning yourself as an expert…you should have ALL your shit together.

A.  This is a perfectionist trap.
B.  This would mean you would have to live in a hut in the middle of nowhere ALONE with all your needs taken care of.

You know…conditions would have to be PERFECT.  Hahahaha!  My life in in New Jersey.  I have five kids.  They are all spirited with complex personalities.  Obviously all kids are, but most of mine are fiery.  Wonder where they get it from.  😉

Even if you are just on social media for fun, you are not being 100% authentic.  I try to be heart authentic as possible, but I’m not posting pics of my junk drawers (yes, plural) or how my bathrooms need to be cleaned. Does this mean people can’t know the real me.  The real me is ALL of it, good, babd, and ugly but lots of times I can’t post stuff related to other people in my life and it’s their business anyway.  Does it hold me back as a writer and blogger…at times yes.  Does it hold me back as a life coach, to not post all the rawness?  No, but dealing with it makes me a better life coach, as I gain more experience, wisdom, knowledge, compassion, clarity, and focus.  You should know I talk to coaches all the time and behind-the-scenes they are struggling, working on, or dealing with something they don’t post about.  They are still being authentic and not phony.  They may use filters on their photos.  I do all the time.  They use retouched photos for their ads and it’s just smart business.  Let’s let go of judging others and ourselves so harshly.  Let people own their best selves and cheer them on as they get closer to it.  I’m cheering you all on and don’t judge you for where you are now.  It’s just today.  Your future self is being created right now.

So if you think you know me from social media, just like all of us, you get a snippet of my life.  Not everyone can be in our private life. I hope you all have friends who can help you when you are going through something…because some people never let anyone in.  If you are going through relationship problems with a partner, child, parent, sibling, or friend, sometimes it’s hard to talk about as it confirms it to be real.  Or we may cry if we start talking.  I have had some really stressful things going on lately (not with the hubs so don’t even get any ideas-LOL!).  I don’t post this on social media, but I will share what I learn on the other side.  If it looks like I am a phony because I post happy things, pretty selfies, and inspiring quotes and you know in my “real life” I have what you would call “problems”…that’s on you.  I am being me in the best way I can.  Going on rants online is not my thing.  Problems are opportunities for solutions.  Just like questions are creating answers.  It’s all about perspective.   There is juice in all of it to be gained.  Be easy on yourself and others. Everyone has got some “stuff.”

I love you guys!

Wishing you all abundant success, passion, happiness, and peace wrapped up in love,
Jenny G. Perry
Mojo Expert-Life Catalyst

P.S.  If you want to set up a call to see if my coaching is right for you, go here:
My FREE telecall next Tuesday:  Self-love isn’t for sissies-How to spot your subconscious blocks and how to finally change your mind.  Register here:

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What anger can teach

sheep

I bless that mother and son. I bless me as a mom with three sons and two daughters. I bless all parents, children, and families. I bless the reactor within the mother, myself, and the reactor in us all. I bless the anger in the mother, myself, and the world.

There was angry woman who was holding her child over her shoulder while running into the bathroom as we were being seated for dinner on vacation. Hey, that could have been me if maybe the wind blew in a slightly different direction that night. She gave him a whack. All my sensors reacted and I bolted into the bathroom. (Baby on my hips, not the smartest choice but the Philly came out in me.) I just needed, on a primal level to make sure the boy was okay. Not really my business, I know, mind my beeswax. But my mind was not in this, my bones were.

When I went into the bathroom, another mother was staring at her and angry mom didn’t notice either of us. I’ve been in that haze of fury before. It felt ugly. He was maybe four years old and out of control. He hit her repeatedly and she smacked his bottom not very hard with his shorts on. Who knows if he was no exhausted, ate a ton of sugar, or underlying issues? I also had noticed cultural differences as another woman the day before who spoke with a foreign accent gave her son a whack right out out on the open (not a bare bum, but over his shorts). She said, “Disgusting!” with pure meanness in her voice. I have boys, so nothing shocks me there but I do get pissed when they say certain things…especially at the wrong time.

That mother in the bathroom had her hands full. I wanted to help. I wanted to help the version of me that is her, where I feel helpless, mad, and out of control. In that situation, I did feel that. I left the bathroom feeling uneasy. I had some judgment from my family that I didn’t need. I have no regret. I will be someone who will pray and come from the highest place, but if my insides push me to try to protect or help, I will. Did what I do solve anything or help in any way? No. But I pray for peace, in her, in me, in the world. I couldn’t have sat at dinner not knowing if he was being beaten.

What I learned about myself on my vacation were many things. I react. I try to control. I want to be close to people and one side cannot decide this. I am not in charge of helping everyone or is it desired by them. I’m not afraid to look within, be seen as wrong, or to not fit in. Time and freedom are major gifts. Fun is underrated. Anger is really easy and really toxic, but can also be a catalyst to figure out what you really want. Life is too short for bullshit and following your dreams and creating your own happiness is the prize. Many are seeking something opposite of this without realizing it. I really can be happy in many settings by my focus on gratitude. My thoughts and focus are superpowers. Awareness is even more heightened after I reset my every day normal by going away on vacation. Clarity is a feeling and not a list written of goals or to-do’s. I will focus more and distract less. Energy is my creative force and I will truly step up and live my truth and fullest potential.